Well, that was interesting. Your use of expletives was spectacular. I’m impressed. Really. I’m envious even. I don’t know that I’ve ever been cursed in a more eloquent manner. Sadly, it was wasted breath.
This is the Customer Service department. I am a Customer Service professional. I am here to help. However, you are not a customer. When you called me a dick, you crossed the line from customer to cunt. And since you’re no longer a customer, I’m no longer a professional. So shut your fucking mouth, you cheap, inbred, sack of shit.
It’s a common misconception. You think because I’m in Customer Service I’ll put up with your shit. Fuck you. You’re an idiot. I don’t care about you. I don’t care about your bullshit problem. Were it possible to reach through this phone, I’d stitch your lips together. Seriously. I hope your tits fall off, you self-absorbed bitch.
I didn’t become a Customer Service professional out of some overwhelming desire to help people. I’m here because I’m a slacker with little ambition. I make shit money and work with morons. I have two breaks a day, have a two-pack habit, and your piss poor grammar is giving me indigestion. So shut up, hang up, and find someone that gives a fuck.
Never call me again. Have a nice fucking day.