That’s it. Laugh it up. Tell your friends. I don’t give a fuck. I’m secure in my sexuality. Your childish jibes mean nothing to me. I’ve been verbally assaulted by the best, and you’ve got shit. You’re a functionally illiterate redneck who apparently likes to expose his ass crack. Pull your damned pants up. Buy a fucking belt. Dickhead.
I don’t need a beard and a beer gut to feel manly. I don’t have a Confederate flag tattoo. I don’t have NASCAR stickers on my car. I don’t wear trucker hats or sleeveless-flannel. I don’t flash my ass every time I bend over. I can read. I have teeth. They aren’t tobacco stained. I have never married a blood relative. I’ve not had relations with a farm animal. And I am one hundred percent hetero-fucking-sexual, you stupid, redneck, homophobe.
But go ahead. Have a good laugh.
And just so you know, I didn’t say I wanted to see Brokeback Mountain. I said I wouldn’t mind seeing it.
And it did have great reviews.